考研倒數(shù)16天：大小寫作得分多--圖畫作文結(jié)構(gòu)

　　北京新航道學(xué)校 李傳偉

　　第十五天：大小寫作 得分多多---圖畫作文結(jié)構(gòu)

　　圖畫作文是考研大作文的主要出題類型，考生必須特別重視。目前已經(jīng)到了考研復(fù)習(xí)的收官階段，考生應(yīng)該對照評分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)確定自己的強項，在考試時加以發(fā)揚，同時找出自己的弱項，加以克服。首先請看兩個重要的評分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)：

　　20-17分 內(nèi)容切題，包括題中所列的各項要求；清楚表達(dá)其內(nèi)涵，文字連貫；句式有變化，句子結(jié)構(gòu)和用詞正確，文章長度符合要求。

　　16-13分 內(nèi)容切題，包括題中所列的各項要求；比較清楚地表達(dá)其內(nèi)涵，文字基本連貫；句式有一定變化，句子結(jié)構(gòu)和用詞錯誤較少。文章長度符合要求。

　　簡而言之，優(yōu)秀的作文應(yīng)該：

　　1.包括題目中要求的全部要點；

　　2.結(jié)構(gòu)規(guī)范清晰；

　　3.詞匯豐富、句子結(jié)構(gòu)有變化。

　　當(dāng)然，最基本的要求是不離題，而且字?jǐn)?shù)(160-200詞)符合要求。下面以2006年大作文的一篇高分范文為例說明高分作文的特征，考生可以將自己的文章與之對照，從而對自己可以提高的地方有直觀的認(rèn)識。

　　2006年大作文(關(guān)于崇拜Beckham的)

　　Directions:

　　Study the following photos carefully and write an essay in which you should:

　　1) describe the photos briefly,

　　2) interpret the social phenomenon reflected by them, and

　　3) give you point of view.

　　You should write 160-200 words neatly on ANSWER SHEET2. (20 points)

　　范文

　　More and more young people are increasingly influenced by foreign culture. As can be clearly seen from the above picture, a young gentleman puts “Beckham” on his face. Another decently dressed young gentleman is willing to pay 300 yuan to have his hair made in his favorite style. It is clear that the picture implies a common phenomenon in our society today: more and more people, especially the young, are endlessly chasing popular things, disregarding the cost that they must pay.

　　There are at least three good reasons for this phenomenon. In the first place, the spreading of foreign culture in our country in recent years may be the main reason. Secondly, many young people in our modern society have an open mind. Consequently, they are willing to accept new things. Last but not least, a lot of people have become richer and richer. As a result, they can pay for the expense to do that kind of things. There may be other reasons for it, but it is generally believed that the above mentioned reasons are commonly acceptable.

　　As far as I am concerned, the spreading of foreign culture in our society is not a bad thing. But as a popular saying goes, every thing has two sides. This phenomenon is without exception. My suggestion as to the best way to cope with the problem is as follows. On the one hand, people should take a proper attitude toward this phenomenon. On the other hand, our society is expected to appeal to the general public to resist its bad effect. I am sure that my opinion is both sound and well-grounded.

　　本文的得分是18分，因為它基本符合20-17分的評分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)：

　　1.包括了問題中的三個要點：

　　第一段，描述圖畫；第二段，闡述圖畫含義；第三段，提出建議措施。

　　2.結(jié)構(gòu)規(guī)范清晰

　　圖畫作文一般寫三段，各段的內(nèi)容分配上面已經(jīng)闡述。這是大的結(jié)構(gòu)安排。本文做到了這一點。具體到各段，還有小結(jié)構(gòu)的安排問題。例如，在第一段中，如果涉及的圖畫有兩幅，每幅圖至少用一句話描述。本文就是這么做的：

　　As can be clearly seen from the above picture, a young gentleman puts “Beckham” on his face. Another decently dressed young gentleman is willing to pay 300 yuan to have his hair made in his favorite style.

　　在第二段中，一般根據(jù)題目的提綱的提示，要么闡述一段所說的現(xiàn)象的原因，通常寫2-3條，要么舉例說明圖畫所反映的問題。在本文的第二段，考生在首句交代本段要從三個方面闡述原因：There are at least three good reasons for this phenomenon，接下來以三個關(guān)聯(lián)詞提示三個原因：In the first place…Secondly…Last but not least…。

　　在最后一段中，考生明確告訴閱卷老師自己提出了建議措施：My suggestion as to the best way to cope with the problem is as follows. On the one hand…On the other hand…。

　　三.用詞準(zhǔn)確、句子結(jié)構(gòu)有變化

　　像disregard (第一段末)、cope with(末段中間)與 appeal to(末段倒數(shù)第二句)等詞與詞組的使用表明考生的用詞比較準(zhǔn)確。與此同時，像被動語態(tài)、形式主語、各種復(fù)合句的使用也說明考生的句子結(jié)構(gòu)不單調(diào)。

　　除了上面的優(yōu)點，范文也有一些不足之處，使它被扣掉2分。最嚴(yán)重的問題是：第二段的三點理由其實只是兩點，因為第二點 “Secondly, many young people in our modern society have an open mind. Consequently, they are willing to accept new things.” 僅僅是對第一點的具體說明，而非與第一點相并列的另一點。

　　綜上所述，一篇高分大作文既要注意整體結(jié)構(gòu)上的完整與規(guī)范，如包含提綱中的全部要點，又要注意微觀上，即段落內(nèi)部結(jié)構(gòu)的完整。