2014考研英語寫作160篇:論時(shí)間(考生作文批改及評分)_跨考網(wǎng)

　　寫作原文

　?、貯s is vividly betrayed in the cartoon, a juvenile, with great efforts, is pushing a clock hand fordward(拼寫錯(cuò)誤，改為forward), becase(拼寫錯(cuò)誤，改為because) he is curious about his futre, (拼寫錯(cuò)誤，改為future;逗號(hào)改為句號(hào)) an(改為An) old man, however, is doing his utmost to push the clock hand backward, because he wants to retrospect his old days. ②Apparantly(拼寫錯(cuò)誤，改為Apparently), what they do is ultimately futile.①Simple as the picture is, its symbolic meaning subtly conveyed(前面加which，構(gòu)成定語從句，修飾symbolic meaning;conveyed時(shí)態(tài)使用錯(cuò)誤。因此，可改為which subtly conveys) is profound and thought-provoking. ②There is little dispute that time is a sovereign gift for all peple(拼寫錯(cuò)誤，改為people) and no one is expected to manipulate or speed up it (speed up為動(dòng)副結(jié)構(gòu)，修飾代詞時(shí)，代詞放中間;可改為speed it up). ③So, attempting a life (加is,構(gòu)成be filled with)filled with no regrets, one should employ his time well, otherwise, a humilating(拼寫錯(cuò)誤，改為humiliating) future will be not far away from us. ④In addition, the old saying:"Time and tide wait for no man" also highlights the magnitude of cherishing time. ⑤Therefore, what we are supposed to do everyday is to make use of every chance to do useful things.①As far as I'm concerned, time invariably treats everyone equally. ②One can become informed and wise by treasuring time. ③Mo Yan, for example, who cherishes every minutes(every+名詞單數(shù)，將minutes改為minute) to think and contemplate (句子缺成分，加“, and he”)has achieved great success in his works. ④Hence let's keep the aphorism in mind forever, that is:"A young idler , (標(biāo)點(diǎn)使用有誤，英語中，每個(gè)標(biāo)點(diǎn)符號(hào)后面應(yīng)該空一個(gè)字符，然后再繼續(xù)書寫單詞)an old beggar".

　　原作點(diǎn)評:

　　第一段描述圖畫的內(nèi)容,應(yīng)注意拼寫問題。第二段揭示圖畫的寓意，深入探討珍惜時(shí)間的重要性;第①句注意時(shí)態(tài)的正確使用;第②句注意單詞拼寫及動(dòng)副結(jié)構(gòu)的使用。第三段通過舉名人的例子及格言“少壯不努力，老大徒傷悲”，點(diǎn)明文章主題?？傮w點(diǎn)評文章亮點(diǎn)：文章結(jié)構(gòu)完整，每個(gè)段落的功能基本得以體現(xiàn)。文章錯(cuò)誤：①語法錯(cuò)誤：文章出現(xiàn)了少量的語法錯(cuò)誤，比如時(shí)態(tài)一致性問題;every+名詞單數(shù)等。②拼寫問題：單詞拼寫錯(cuò)誤情況較為嚴(yán)重，望細(xì)心改正。

　　修改意見：

　　文章整體構(gòu)思、用詞還不錯(cuò)，但是單詞拼寫錯(cuò)誤較多。希望作者在以后的寫作中，避免這一問題的發(fā)生。同時(shí)要注意在復(fù)習(xí)過程中，留意一些基本的語法點(diǎn)，減少作文中的錯(cuò)誤?？梢越Y(jié)合英語寫作范文，積累更多的詞匯和句子，為作文添彩。加油，祝你考研成功!!

　　參考分?jǐn)?shù)(滿分20分)：14

　　2014年考研英語作文專題

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